Thursday, April 27, 2006

WHERE IS MOSES WHEN WE NEED HIM MOST?

"LET MY PEOPLE GO!"
Legend...Power...Purpose...all just typical Moses...
After freeing the Jews from Pharaoh in Egypt, Moses continued his 'Let My People Go' Campaign in Europe. He crusaded on to save the Russians, Slavs, Poles, Disabled, Homosexuals, Sinti, Roma, and the Jews again from Nazi Germany during World War II. Moses was a cultural icon at the peak of his power; however, that didn't last long. When Vietnam came along, Moses didn't receive so much as a phone call requesting his help. Why didn't we ask for his help? Why didn't we ask for David Bowie's help? Why not Lassie? This all baffles me...
And now, it only saddens me as I see the signs of the horrible infamy to come. Condi Rice & Donald Rumsfeld have gone to Iraq to support the struggling new leaders. Meanwhile, the situation in Iran continues to escalate daily as threats keep rolling in from all directions. The Mid-East conflict is turning into a giant pissing contest...and f@&k humanity, if everyone demands to be dealt into the game. Calm down right?
WRONG!!!
Killer f@$king chimps are on the prowl...
Plague-infested mice HAVE ESCAPED!!!
and did I mention the F@&KING KILLER CHIMPS, OH MY GOD!!!
A dodgy source added, "The chimps and mice met up and have decided to pursue the enrichment of uranium. Iran isn't the major concern, it is the killer chimps and the plague-infested mice. If they succeed, then we're all damned."
SO WHAT IN THE HELL DO WE DO?
CALL MOSES...and if that Moses isn't available, try Moses Malone...and if he isn't, hell, try Karl Malone...anyone...
Get Moses, Get Ziggy Stardust Bowie, Get Lassie...and, TAKE CARE OF THE SITUATION!
The world needs help!!!...ground control to Major Moses...